WHERE'S THE CAKE?
My friend Diana had been dropping hints here and there for weeks. It was getting closer and closer to my birthday and she'd made plans. Problem was, Diana was always making plans and when Diana made plans you can bet they would be unusual, exotic, adventuresome, exciting to say the least! Diana was always cooking up something! She was like no other person I'd ever met, but that's a good thing, because I don't think I would have enough energy for more than one of her. She bubbled! No, not gushed, I mean she bubbled! After you'd spent some time with her you began to feel like you'd swallowed a coke too fast and the fizz went up your nose. She was a flirt and I mean that in a good way. It didn't matter if you were eight or eighty, she flirted with you and you always walked away feeling special. To be touched by Diana's energy is like swallowing a sunbeam. It radiates through every pore. She told me to expect a BIG surprise. I tried to get Lou to tell me what was going on but she'd threatened him (I'm pretty sure) because he wouldn't so much as let out a peep!
DON'T GO BELOW!
The big day finally arrived. Diana and Jess showed up with suitcases packed. I'd been instructed to pack us one for two days. Where in the world was she taking me, and how did I know I'd like it? I'm really juat an old "fuddy duddy" kinda gal. I don't care to be gone overnight but this time I had no choice. Aparently she'd gone to a lot of trouble and I was going to enjoy it-----or else!
Lou came home from work and changed clothes then we were off!
We drove down to Port's of Call in San Pedro. We boarded a boat and settled down on deck with a frozen strawberry marguerita. Well, I thought, this is nice. I'd never been on a boat before and thought the motion of the waves was quite pleasant. Up and down, up and down we went. It really smelled quite awful, what with the fish and the sea lions. Sea gulls dropped their poop here and there. Ker-splat! Next to my chair. Diana was laughing. Diana laughed constantly. It trickled up from the bottom of her toes, past her throat and out her mouth like a bubbling brook.She couldn't help herself.She infected those around her. I knew within the next hour she would know all about the couples sitting next to us from where they worked to how many divorces they'd been through. She was a very good listener.
Back to my story. It's easy to get sidetracked when thinking of Diana. The boat started up and we moved out of the harbor, up and down, up and down. I tried to concentrate on what everyone was saying. Diana said we were going to Catalina for the weekend. Wasn't I excited? Diana was always eager to began any adventure. I think she was a gypsy at heart.. Oh, that smell was nauseating! And nauseated I became. I whispered to Lou that I felt sick. Diana gave me a stern look and told me under no circumstances was I to go below to the bathroom! But I was on my feet, pushing, and feeling my way trough the inside of the boat, down some stairs and into the bathroom where I saw stall after stall, all painted an ugly olive green. Women were puking everywhere! I found a commode and hugged it. Next thing I knew Diana had me by my arms, dragging me backwards out of the stall and pushed me back up the stairs and outside. I glimpsed my reflection in a mirror along the way. It was NOT a pretty sight! All my make-up was running down my cheeks and dripping off my chin, snot bubbles came out of my nose, my hair piece was beyond repair. The wind was blowing sea spray up into my face so by now I not only smelled like puke, but I smelled like rotten seaweed puke! Diana kept telling me to look at the flying fish, look at the flying fish! I saw them ok, but by now everything was flying past me! My contacts had slid up into my eyes so I was pretty much blind as a bat. Just take me now Lord, I prayed silently,before I became an embarassment to my husband and friends.
I felt the boat shut down to a crawl and I could vaguely make out the Catalina pier. Dry Land!! I was never so glad to see anything in my life!! My knees wobbled as we got off, found our hotel and went to our rooms to freshen up. Freshen up? I had to strip down naked, jump into the shower and start all over! We shopped, went sight seeing, ate dinner and danced at Avalon to a big name band. It would have been so much nicer had I felt better, and God knows I tried, but by the next day I was begging Lou to let me fly home instead of take the boat back. I promised him every thing I could think of----to no avail. He just laughed and told me I'd live.Never trust a sailo! At that moment I could have easily wrung his neck! He and Jess were leaving a day early because they had to get back to work. I dreaded staying behind an extra day. I needed him not only to hold my hand but also my head! The jerk!
How could he just sail away and leave me here to suffer? I thought of Diana and how she'd tried to make this a wonderful birthday experience for me and I loved her for it. I also prayed silently that we'd NEVER do it again!
AHOY, AVAST, AND ANCHORS AWAY!
That morning we packed our suitcases then headed out for the beautiful Mexican restaurant up the street.
Men strolled between the tables strumming their guitars and singing requested songs from the patrons. All I could think of was "Spanish Eyes." Diana laughed. She ordered me a frozen strawberry margurita and made me drink all of it. I didn't care for alcohool or wine so seldom drank anything with spirits in it. She ordered me another one. Some people she'd met on the boat coming over stopped at our table to chat. The man ordered us all a drink.; Diana looked at me and giggled. I'd never drank more thana couple of drinks at a time in my life. After the third one slid down I felt strangly warm and fuzzy. I silently sang Spanish Eyes under my breath. After that last drink I felt WONDERFUL!!!! Everything Diana said to me was funny and I laughed loudly, I'd swallow air, burp then hiccup. She led me onto the boat and walked me to the front of it. There was a railing around the boat which she propped me up against. She grabbed a chair behind me and sat down, then propped her foot up against my butt, opened her book and lost herself inside the pages. We rode all the way back to Ports of Cal with me singing Spanish Eyes all the way. By the time we landed I'd pretty much sobered up. Jess met us at the dock and she had a field day telling him about my latest encounter. As I sit by my fireplace watching the snowflakes fall,my mind begans to wander back through time to a day when it was my birthday and I had the priviledge of sharing it with three of my best friends. Hiccup (scuse me)
My friend Diana had been dropping hints here and there for weeks. It was getting closer and closer to my birthday and she'd made plans. Problem was, Diana was always making plans and when Diana made plans you can bet they would be unusual, exotic, adventuresome, exciting to say the least! Diana was always cooking up something! She was like no other person I'd ever met, but that's a good thing, because I don't think I would have enough energy for more than one of her. She bubbled! No, not gushed, I mean she bubbled! After you'd spent some time with her you began to feel like you'd swallowed a coke too fast and the fizz went up your nose. She was a flirt and I mean that in a good way. It didn't matter if you were eight or eighty, she flirted with you and you always walked away feeling special. To be touched by Diana's energy is like swallowing a sunbeam. It radiates through every pore. She told me to expect a BIG surprise. I tried to get Lou to tell me what was going on but she'd threatened him (I'm pretty sure) because he wouldn't so much as let out a peep!
DON'T GO BELOW!
The big day finally arrived. Diana and Jess showed up with suitcases packed. I'd been instructed to pack us one for two days. Where in the world was she taking me, and how did I know I'd like it? I'm really juat an old "fuddy duddy" kinda gal. I don't care to be gone overnight but this time I had no choice. Aparently she'd gone to a lot of trouble and I was going to enjoy it-----or else!
Lou came home from work and changed clothes then we were off!
We drove down to Port's of Call in San Pedro. We boarded a boat and settled down on deck with a frozen strawberry marguerita. Well, I thought, this is nice. I'd never been on a boat before and thought the motion of the waves was quite pleasant. Up and down, up and down we went. It really smelled quite awful, what with the fish and the sea lions. Sea gulls dropped their poop here and there. Ker-splat! Next to my chair. Diana was laughing. Diana laughed constantly. It trickled up from the bottom of her toes, past her throat and out her mouth like a bubbling brook.She couldn't help herself.She infected those around her. I knew within the next hour she would know all about the couples sitting next to us from where they worked to how many divorces they'd been through. She was a very good listener.
Back to my story. It's easy to get sidetracked when thinking of Diana. The boat started up and we moved out of the harbor, up and down, up and down. I tried to concentrate on what everyone was saying. Diana said we were going to Catalina for the weekend. Wasn't I excited? Diana was always eager to began any adventure. I think she was a gypsy at heart.. Oh, that smell was nauseating! And nauseated I became. I whispered to Lou that I felt sick. Diana gave me a stern look and told me under no circumstances was I to go below to the bathroom! But I was on my feet, pushing, and feeling my way trough the inside of the boat, down some stairs and into the bathroom where I saw stall after stall, all painted an ugly olive green. Women were puking everywhere! I found a commode and hugged it. Next thing I knew Diana had me by my arms, dragging me backwards out of the stall and pushed me back up the stairs and outside. I glimpsed my reflection in a mirror along the way. It was NOT a pretty sight! All my make-up was running down my cheeks and dripping off my chin, snot bubbles came out of my nose, my hair piece was beyond repair. The wind was blowing sea spray up into my face so by now I not only smelled like puke, but I smelled like rotten seaweed puke! Diana kept telling me to look at the flying fish, look at the flying fish! I saw them ok, but by now everything was flying past me! My contacts had slid up into my eyes so I was pretty much blind as a bat. Just take me now Lord, I prayed silently,before I became an embarassment to my husband and friends.
I felt the boat shut down to a crawl and I could vaguely make out the Catalina pier. Dry Land!! I was never so glad to see anything in my life!! My knees wobbled as we got off, found our hotel and went to our rooms to freshen up. Freshen up? I had to strip down naked, jump into the shower and start all over! We shopped, went sight seeing, ate dinner and danced at Avalon to a big name band. It would have been so much nicer had I felt better, and God knows I tried, but by the next day I was begging Lou to let me fly home instead of take the boat back. I promised him every thing I could think of----to no avail. He just laughed and told me I'd live.Never trust a sailo! At that moment I could have easily wrung his neck! He and Jess were leaving a day early because they had to get back to work. I dreaded staying behind an extra day. I needed him not only to hold my hand but also my head! The jerk!
How could he just sail away and leave me here to suffer? I thought of Diana and how she'd tried to make this a wonderful birthday experience for me and I loved her for it. I also prayed silently that we'd NEVER do it again!
AHOY, AVAST, AND ANCHORS AWAY!
That morning we packed our suitcases then headed out for the beautiful Mexican restaurant up the street.
Men strolled between the tables strumming their guitars and singing requested songs from the patrons. All I could think of was "Spanish Eyes." Diana laughed. She ordered me a frozen strawberry margurita and made me drink all of it. I didn't care for alcohool or wine so seldom drank anything with spirits in it. She ordered me another one. Some people she'd met on the boat coming over stopped at our table to chat. The man ordered us all a drink.; Diana looked at me and giggled. I'd never drank more thana couple of drinks at a time in my life. After the third one slid down I felt strangly warm and fuzzy. I silently sang Spanish Eyes under my breath. After that last drink I felt WONDERFUL!!!! Everything Diana said to me was funny and I laughed loudly, I'd swallow air, burp then hiccup. She led me onto the boat and walked me to the front of it. There was a railing around the boat which she propped me up against. She grabbed a chair behind me and sat down, then propped her foot up against my butt, opened her book and lost herself inside the pages. We rode all the way back to Ports of Cal with me singing Spanish Eyes all the way. By the time we landed I'd pretty much sobered up. Jess met us at the dock and she had a field day telling him about my latest encounter. As I sit by my fireplace watching the snowflakes fall,my mind begans to wander back through time to a day when it was my birthday and I had the priviledge of sharing it with three of my best friends. Hiccup (scuse me)
